Never Say Goodbye
by MelMat
Summary: Matt's sitting at a bar, when a song comes on he really doesn't want to hear. It played memories inside his head. Ones that he can't escape from, no matter how hard he tried.


_**Disclaimer:** Matt and Mello belong to Death Note creators, Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata_

_Written to Bon Jovi's Never Say Goodbye_

* * *

><p>It had been four years since Matt had seen Mello. The blonde that stole his heart and never gave it back. Matt sat in a little bar, that was close to his California apartment. He sipped his beer as one sad song came after another. Matt wondered why he did this to himself? Why is he still searching? The only answer he could give himself was that he had to, he couldn't give up. Matt remembered his promise even if Mello forgot his the day he stormed out of Wammy's. Then it happened, a song that Matt had never been able to stomach listening to since Mello left. Matt went into a past time that would remain one of the most precious memories he would ever hold, with the day he first met Mello and the day of their first kiss, followed close behind it.<p>

**_-FLASHBACK-_**

_Matt's head was spinning, he sat there remembering the taste of Mello's lips as they pressed up against his. The sweetness of chocolate as his mouth opened for Matt. The look in his eyes as he stared at Matt wondering if today was going to be the day. Matt smiled at that thought. Mello looked a little scared, but his pride wouldn't allow it. Matt pulled him closer to him, cradling him like he was the most precious thing on this earth, and Mello took in all that Matt had to offer. They made love for the first time, their bodies connecting as though they were made to be together. It was slow, passionate. Matt carefully entered Mello as his hands took Mello's into his, their fingers in twined. Their hearts beating so hard against their chests. Matt looked into Mello's eyes. He had been in love with this boy from the first moment he laid eyes on him and now he was claiming him for himself. Matt tried hard to control himself, he didn't want to hurt Mello, but he was making it hard. All the little moans and cries he let out each time Matt thrusted back inside him was heaven to his ears. They both called out the others name as the pleasure over came them. In the aftermath Mello looked up at Matt with a breathless smile._

_"Always love me Matty, never leave me." He said softly. Matt stared at him with the eyes of pure love. "I promise you Mel, I'll always love and be here for you."_

_**-FLASHBACK END**_-

Matt was pulled out of his memory as the song ended. He didn't even notice the tears that had collected in his goggles. Matt got up and went to the bathroom, so he could fix them. In the privacy of the bathroom, Matt let the pain out as his back rested against the wall. He hated it so much, being without Mello even after all these years still felt like he couldn't breath. Matt sat on the dirty bathroom floor with his head rested against the wall. The tears streamed down his face.

_**-FLASHBACK-**_

_"Matt, I'm leaving. L is dead and they want me to work with Near. Me Matt? I can't work with Near, I hate him! I can't stay here anymore. I will catch Kira my way." Mello spoke loud but not in a degrading tone to Matt._

_"I'm coming with you then."_

_"No, you have to stay here, I don't know what I will do or where I am going. I don't want to have to worry about you to. This is dangerous Matt." Mello said as he looked at Matt._

_"Dangerous Mello? Then tell me how the hell I am suppose to let you go off, if it is so dangerous?"_

_"Matty" Mello walked up to him, wrapping his arms around Matt. "I have to do this, don't you understand? The bastard killed L. I will have his head and I won't stop until I do." Mello spoke with a fierce loyalty._

_Mello let go and continued to pack the few things he wanted to take. Matt beside him taking them back out and putting everything back the way it was._

_"DAMN IT MATT!"_

_Matt knew it was a loosing battle, but like hell if he wasn't going to at least try. He knew that once Mello's mind was made up there was no changing it._

_"Please Mello, don't go!" Matt pleaded as he took Mello's face into his hands. He gently kissed him, but the kiss became demanding and harsh. Mello felt the tears prickling his eyes, he wasn't going to cry. Mello pulled away. He turned to grab his bag. Matt stood there. That was the first time Matt had noticed the song on the radio was Bon Jovi's Never Say Goodbye._

_"MELLO, PLEASE! " Matt cried to him. He had never seen the red-head cry before, and it literally tore him apart. He couldn't let this affect his leaving._

_"I have to do this, this isn't goodbye..Never Say Goobye Matty." pulling Matt into another embrace. Matt's green eyes shined so bright through his tears. Mello knew if this kept up he would stay there. His Matty's heart was breaking._

_"No please Mel..Don't leave me!"_

_Matt kissed him again, it was full of pleading, needing. Matt's hands went to Mello's pants. He stroked Mello through the leather. He prayed just hoping for one more night. Mello's breath hitched, he wanted Matt. Their kiss deepened, until Mello could devour Matt at that point. Matt's lips caressing against Mello's as he tried to take Mello's shirt off. Mello was pulled out of it. He couldn't do it._

_"Matt, I have to go..we can't do this. Matty please." Mello explained. Matt didn't listen instead pulled him close to him for a kiss once more. Matt tried to hold onto Mello as long as he could, and that's when Mello bit Matt's lower lip. Matt pulled away from Mello in disbelief, looking at the blood on his finger from his lip. Mello turned, grabbed his bag and ran out of the room, before Matt could register what happened. Matt chased after him, but he couldn't find him. He couldn't have gotten that far already. Matt stood under a street lamp in shear panic, with Mello no where in sight._

_(What Matt didn't know was Mello watched from the shadows as Matt dropped to his knees, in the street under the illuminated light. Mello had broken himself that night. He would never be the same again. He had just destroyed the only person who meant anything to him.)_

_**- FLASH BACK END-**_

Matt hit his head hard against the wall, wiping his eyes. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror. He decided it was time to go home. He had things to do. He was in fact still looking for Mello, and one day his blonde would be back in his arms. Matt, gave a nod to the bartender and headed for the door. He pushed the door open with his body as he reached in his pocket for his keys. The night air rushed across his body. He opened the car door and slid in. The car roared to life as it started, and was put it in gear. Matt wasn't half way down the road, when he turned the radio on.

"WHAT THE FUCKING GOD DAMN HELL!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. As if someone was playing a cruel joke on him. It was the same song.

"I can't believe this is happening, his tears started again as he sung the lyrics as if they were going to save him somehow. He pulled up to a stoplight. Matt's body trembled from his shear emotional state. He couldn't help it. He wanted Mello back so bad, he swore out loud he would do anything just to see him again.

"ANYTHING MATTY?"

Matt turned around in his seat and there he was..his blonde angel.

"Matty, lights green." Mello smiled at him, the look on Matt's face was as priceless as he was.

"MELLO!" Matt cried as he pulled the car over to the side of the rode, undone his seatbelt and flew into the backseat. Matt found himself wrapped in Mello's arms, kisses raining down on him. His happiness only foreshadowed by Mello's. They didn't move from each other.

"Mello? HOW?" Matt asked him, baffled.

"NEVER SAY GOODBYE MATTY, REMEMBER?" with a classic Mello smirk and he pulled Matt closer to him. Mello never left him again. They made their plans to take down Kira as a team, as best friends as lovers.

(_**January 26, 2010**_)

Mello woke Matt up early with a cup of coffee, making sure he also brought him his cigarettes. The last few hours they had left before their plan was to be initiated. Mello looked at Matt pulling him close to him, wanting nothing more then to not let go. They laid tangled in each other after making love one last time. The smile on Mello's face spoke volumes to Matt. He knew it was time. They got dressed and headed to the bike and car. Matt grabbed Mello pulling him into a hug that spoke more "I don't want to loose you." then the words themselves would have said. He tucked Mello's hair behind his ears, giving him one last kiss, before placing Mello's helmet on his head. Matt reached up to touch the visor but his hand fell back to his side as he turned away.

**_(30 minutes later)_**

Matt shot off the smokescreen and hurried off in the direction planned.

**_(10 minutes later)_**

Matt looked out the car at the road block of cars. The agents all out standing in a row. Matt finally got out of the car, vowing they wouldn't shoot him, but spoke to soon. The bullets riddled through his body and car. Matt felt himself fall to the cement. It wouldn't take long before his breath became shallow. Matt thought of Mello in that time , hoping he had given him enough time to get Takada and get out. Matt shook as he felt his body grow colder, knowing his time had come.

"Just remember Mello..never say goodbye- I'll be waiting for you."

In his final second of his life he remembered his angelic deadly blonde, with a fond smile as his eyes closed and his cigarette fell from his lips.


End file.
